Do you discuss personal matters with your co-workers and reveal complicated details that could later not serve you well?
It's kind of hard sometimes not to. After all, these are the people with whom you spend at least eight hours a day, five days a week. You're practically living with them - you spend more time with your co-workers than you do with your own family.
There are several reasons for not sharing personal information. You may not want to burden your colleagues with keeping a secret, or not trust them with doing so. By the time you find out someone has shared your story with the wrong person, it's usually too late.
There are also other reasons for keeping personal information out of work. Let's explore these reasons now.
Decisions are made and impressions formed about us while at work, that are used for different reasons than those with our families and friends. For example, a person being considered for a promotion would benefit from having an image of strength, excellent judgment and good interpersonal skills. How might your recent disclosure to your colleagues that you are divorcing your alcoholic husband, just obtained a restraining order in fear for your life, and are worried about making your house payment, affect your chances for promotion? You can't sleep, fear you are depressed and need support from friends during this difficult time. In this situation it would be wise to make an appointment with an Employee Assistance Program Counselor and use friends and family for support, letting colleagues at work know that you are divorcing, but keeping the details brief.
Revealing too much about yourself may give people the wrong impression or rather the impression you don't want them to have. In general, you do want to preserve some level of privacy.
Too much sharing has a negative impact on productivity, an emotional impact on the work environment, and can also be unhealthy for participants who really should seek nurture and friendship elsewhere.
It may on occasion be relevant to share your personal challenges with your Manager, however ensure that it is not more than they need to know, and that it is communicated in a way that indicates you have awareness about your situation and are managing it well. This is empowering. Sharing personal information isn't in and of itself a mistake - it's sharing too much of it that can come back to bite you.
As with anything else, you are the only one who can decide what, and how much, information you want to share in the workplace. The decision is yours. And the consequences are yours to deal with too.
Coaching Tips
It's kind of hard sometimes not to. After all, these are the people with whom you spend at least eight hours a day, five days a week. You're practically living with them - you spend more time with your co-workers than you do with your own family.
There are several reasons for not sharing personal information. You may not want to burden your colleagues with keeping a secret, or not trust them with doing so. By the time you find out someone has shared your story with the wrong person, it's usually too late.
There are also other reasons for keeping personal information out of work. Let's explore these reasons now.
Decisions are made and impressions formed about us while at work, that are used for different reasons than those with our families and friends. For example, a person being considered for a promotion would benefit from having an image of strength, excellent judgment and good interpersonal skills. How might your recent disclosure to your colleagues that you are divorcing your alcoholic husband, just obtained a restraining order in fear for your life, and are worried about making your house payment, affect your chances for promotion? You can't sleep, fear you are depressed and need support from friends during this difficult time. In this situation it would be wise to make an appointment with an Employee Assistance Program Counselor and use friends and family for support, letting colleagues at work know that you are divorcing, but keeping the details brief.
Revealing too much about yourself may give people the wrong impression or rather the impression you don't want them to have. In general, you do want to preserve some level of privacy.
Too much sharing has a negative impact on productivity, an emotional impact on the work environment, and can also be unhealthy for participants who really should seek nurture and friendship elsewhere.
It may on occasion be relevant to share your personal challenges with your Manager, however ensure that it is not more than they need to know, and that it is communicated in a way that indicates you have awareness about your situation and are managing it well. This is empowering. Sharing personal information isn't in and of itself a mistake - it's sharing too much of it that can come back to bite you.
As with anything else, you are the only one who can decide what, and how much, information you want to share in the workplace. The decision is yours. And the consequences are yours to deal with too.
Coaching Tips
- Be selective about the personal information you share and with whom you choose to share it.
- If you are a Manager or Leader, be even more careful. A rule of thumb is, be the best friend you can be to your employees, but don't think for a minute they're your best friends.
- Whether you're a Manager or not, don't entirely withhold personal information. It can backfire. It makes you look secretive or dishonest. Sharing appropriate amounts of personal information enables others to see the human side of you, and, in turn, builds relationships.
- When a personal situation is impacting your ability to perform your job, be honest but be brief. It's enough to say "I'm going through a rough time right now but my job is important to me. I'll work on keeping my focus and paying closer attention to the details.
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